I’ve always wanted to make babies with my beloved.
I’ve dreamed of the day I become a mommy since I was a little girl. I’ve been practicing being a good mommy since the time I had families of dolls and stuffed animals. My nurturing side has been turned to high since I was born.
I never doubted for a second that motherhood was my dharma.
So why hasn’t it happened for me? Throughout my life I’ve heard two things related to this:
1. You will make an incredible mother.
2. Why aren’t you a mother already?
I have two general responses to this feedback:
1. I am so flattered and totally agree. I can’t wait!
2. I am embarrassed, partly ashamed, and deflated.
Most seem to think that I haven’t made time but that couldn’t be further from the truth. This part of my life has been a priority. I have been in two long time partnerships with men that said they wanted children but when it came time to move forward either they weren’t ready or changed their minds.
Or as I came to find out recently, the hesitation was that he didn’t want to make babies with me.
The reality is that I’ve lost most of my child birthing years to “waiting” for HIM to say yes, years I can’t get back.
Meanwhile, over the years I have quit successful careers, quit my high paying job, sold my business, moved across the country, given up rights to accrued financial wealth, changed my diet, dedicated myself to Eastern methodologies and Western medicine all to serve this intention.
For the wrong “him” it just hasn’t been enough.
However, it isn’t too late.
I trust in the divine purpose and plan and know the timing will reveal itself.
Inevitably I get asked what would I have done differently?
1. I would have stood more firmly with the men in my life to tell me their truth.
2. I would have started educating myself on my Women’s Code sooner.
3. I would stopped carrying around so much shame as I was “waiting.”
4. I would have short cut the waiting.
Don’t let other people’s schedules dictate the timings of your life. Don’t believe in just one way. Believe in your way, and remember it’s never too late.
Love yourself, love your day, love your life!